What Other Occupations Should Lupe Fiasco Consider?

Supafest 2012

By Elijah Watson

Lupe Fiasco has grown more erratic on Twitter this past year, which led to him making his account private. Regardless of the change news quickly spread that the rapper would be writing his own novel…on Twitter. Lupe’s self-described “Afro-Futurist” novel, currently titled “Teriyaki Joe: Neo Harlem Detective,” will be written entirely on Twitter, and published in chapters.

Honestly, the first chapter of Lupe’s novel isn’t bad. There’s a crime noir aesthetic about it, and some of the story’s more unexpected parts–Coach and Chanel creating vaginal implants for example–border between absurd and entertaining.

So, now that Lupe kind of has a novel under his belt, what else should the rapper venture into? Well, we have some suggestions:

Screenwriting: You’re practically already on your way so why not give this a shot? “Teriyaki Joe: Neo Harlem Detective” sounds like it could be the next “Black Dynamite,” possibly even better. At the very least you could make it into a manga a la Afro Samurai.

Comedian: That brief Twitter stint where you imagined different “Control” verses from other rappers was hilarious, and reminded most of us that at your core you’re still pretty awesome. Maybe doing something in standup is your next calling.

Lead Singer For A Hardcore Punk Band: When you performed in Austin, Texas, for this year’s Fun Fun Fun Fest, you came across as extremely agitated and mad. So much so that you only performed a few songs before going offstage. Fronting a hardcore band (or heavy rock band) would help with those frustrations, especially considering that you’d be yelling into someone’s face each night.

Assistant To President Obama: Hahaha, just kidding. We know how you feel about Obama.

Professional Skateboarding: You gave the world “Kick, Push.” Enough said.