By Chris Yuscavage
Where does the time go?
It feels like just yesterday we were talking about all of the rap-related things that we were thankful for this year at the Thanksgiving table. Now, we’re just a few short days away from Christmas. And while we’ve bought something nice for the significant others in our lives, scooped up a couple things for our closest friends and made sure that all of our Moms (and Dads!) will be taken care of on Christmas morning, there are still a few folks we need to shop for. Like Drake! And Lil Wayne! And Eminem! And Jay-Z! And … good grief, how much time do we have again?
But seriously: Our favorite rappers have given us hit singles, free mixtapes and viral videos to keep us entertained all year long. So, we have to give them something this holiday season, right? In the spirit of Christmas, RapFix decided to sit down and make a list of the 23 things we’re giving 23 of our favorite MCs of 2010. After all, ’tis the season.
Drake: A calculator that can handle square roots
Lil Wayne: A 2TB hard drive for the 5,072,658 new songs he’s recorded in the last month and a half
Eminem: A Grammy Award display case — wait, make that two Grammy Award display cases
Nicki Minaj: A blue wig mixed with splashes of yellow, a touch of red, green polka dots and a purple stripe that runs down the middle (that’s the last one you need to complete your collection, right, Nick?)
Jay-Z: A bigger wallet
Lil’ Kim: A time machine returning us all to 1996 (Hardcore?!?!)
Wiz Khalifa: A more reliable weed carrier and a bottle of THC detox capsules
Joe Budden: A bag of mixed vegetables — with a card that says, “Dear Joe: no more beef in 2011!”
Kanye West: A long-overdue apology
Raekwon: A guest appearance on every big rap release in 2011
Swizz Beatz: A week-long vacation (don’t you need a break, fam?)
Rick Ross: A tall stack of Lex Luger beats
Snoop Dogg: An endorsement deal with Ford … oh, Snoop’s got one of those already? Fine. Then, an endorsement deal with Pepsi … ah, he’s got one of those, too? Um, then why are we buying something for him again?
Jay Electronica: A calendar with an album release date clearly circled in bright-red Sharpie
Diddy: A keyboard with a functioning CAPS LOCK key
50 Cent: A new ADT home security system
Young Jeezy: The same thing we’re getting Jay Electronica
Game: Do we have enough of those calendars with release dates to go around?
What would you buy your favorite MC for Christmas this year? Tweet us at @MTVRapFix or tell us in a comment below!